I'd Like To Teach the World...

Inspired by this classic Coca-Cola ad and jingle...



... finish this sentence:

"I'd like to teach the world..."

BOO

Rock & Rant - Volume III

Welcome back to Rock and Rant. You can rock. You can rant. Or you can do both. I don't care. All I ask you come at it with fire in your belly.

Agree with me. Disagree with me.

Either way is fine. Just bring something to the table...

And in case you missed it, Rock & Rant Volume I went a little something like this... Followed by Volume II...

Now, for Volume III... the target of my fire and ire is a NY Times writer and an entire school board.

William C. Rhoden is a columnist for the New York Times who recently penned a column with the following headline:

Yankees-Dodgers Is the Finish Baseball Needs

Now, as a Phillies fan, you do remember the World Champion Phillies, right?

As a Phillies fan, I of course took umbrage to that headline.

But as a baseball fan, I could in some way see the logic behind it... in some way.

Not this way...

"And with all due respect to those two other potential matchups, it’s a Yankees-Dodgers World Series that could take the game back to its roots at a time when baseball desperately needs to recover a portion of the trust, if not the innocence, that it has lost in the steroid era."

'lost in the steroid era?'

As in the Alex Rodriguez and Manny Ramirez "steroid era?"

As in the Alex Rodriguez of the Yankees and Manny Ramirez of the Dodgers "steroid era?"

Last time I checked Billy, there is no one on the Phillies, save for JC Romero who was suspended for 50 games this year for using a supplement that the Major League Baseball Players Association had told players was acceptable -- who's even close to being linked to the "steroid era."

Willie C goes on to write...

"Two venerable franchises competing in a World Series would recall an era in baseball when things seemed simpler and the game was more pure."

And he closes his piece with this Mary Poppins-esque edict:

"It needs Yankees-Dodgers, for the good of the game."

'For the good of the game.'

Boy if that doesn't want to make you run out and by a Normal Rockwell painting, a box of Cracker Jack and a Chevrolet, I don't know what does.

Gee Bill, I sure hope the Phillies and Angels don't interfere with your grand plan. Clearly the fate of baseball as we know it is at stake.

Here's the link to William's piece if you're so inclined...

Zachary Christie, had faced 45 days in an alternative school for troublemakers for doing something so horrific, so deplorable, I am reluctant to even bring it up.

Mr. Christie had the unmitigated gall (is there another kind?) to bring a utensil — a combination folding knife, fork and spoon — to school to eat lunch.

I know, I know... it's repugnant.

You would think a man with his 6 years of wisdom under his belt would know better.

Yeah, Zachary Christie is a 6 year old boy and brain-dead seven-member of the Christina School Board in Delaware originally deemed this act to be so heinous that they had no recourse but to remand young Zachary to the aforementioned alternative school for troublemakers.

However, after the obligatory outcry from both near and far, yesterday the board voted unanimously to reduce the punishment for kindergartners and first-graders who take weapons to school or commit violent offenses to a suspension ranging from three to five days.

Well thank God. I know I will sleep better at night knowing Zachary has been dealt with properly.

But... perhaps the good folks of Delaware may want to call for a new vote on the Christina School Board for this is not the first time something like this has occurred.

Last year, a fifth-grade girl was ordered expelled after she brought a birthday cake to school and a serrated knife to cut it with.

The expulsion was overturned, and it led to a state law that gave districts more flexibility on punishments. But that law applied only to conduct that triggers expulsions, not suspensions.

Wendy Lapham, the school district's spokeswoman summed up the complete and utter ineptitude thusly...

"We have to follow the policy as it is written consistently because this is the code of conduct that is applied to all of our students in our district," she said. "It's never a question of a child's character or comparing one child to another."

Brilliant Wendy, brilliant...

Til next time...

The Long A.A.R.M. of Steve O...

MORE...
Aimless
Assemblage of
Rambling
Musings of an
over-caffeinated, slightly ajar yet well-meaning writer.

I cannot believe it's been so long since I posted anything... I can just imagine the void that's been in your life. I am so sorry. I am so... oh wait, I think I'm writing this blog for my own edification.

Well, on the off chance that someone, somewhere out there is actually reading and dare I say, following the O Zone... I apologize for my tardiness.

Just gonna go rapid fire...

• Enough already with the Jon & Kate Plus 8 crap. Seriously, why would anyone care? Oh wait, this is America, the land of People magazine and the E! Channel. Where every has-been and never-will can star in their very own "reality" show. Reality TV. Boy if that's that not an oxymoron, I don't know what is.
  
  Oh wait, this just in... according to people.com, Kate isn't taking Jon's alleged swiping of $230,00 from their joint bank account lying down. She's fighting back. And even went so far to say she "would work at McDonald's" to help her kids.
  
  I'm gonna have a tough call this year the Mother of the Year contest. I think it;s a dead heat between Kate and Carol Brady. Too close to call...

• The Phillies will beat the Rockies in 4 games.

• I think Roman Polanski should spend the rest of his life behind bars. Statute of Limitations my ass...
  

• Here's my Week 5 NFL Power Rankings if you're so inclined...

• On the subject of David Letterman. Three words. Mind. Your. Business. Seriously. Did he kill anyone? As far as we know, did he coerce anyone? What he did was deplorable for sure. But it's none of our business people. Oh wait, you say it is cause he's a public figure. Bullshit. It all goes back to the National Enquirer, Jerry Springer mentality the majority of Americans seem to have and live their lives in...
  

• Is that a banana in your pocket.. or a condom? Check out the new condom campaign from "Down Under." Sorry, couldn't resist.
  

• Speaking of McDonald's and campaigns... love this one... Digital billboards in Kansas City began to display headlines written by local McDonald’s customers for the new Angus Third Pounders.

• Finally check these out... it's a series of banner-type ads that are promoting the new Halloween movie. These are truly fabulous as they not only promote the movie, they give the rest of us hope that someday something like this may actually happen to those annoying dolts on these kinds of ads. Enjoy...

Til next time...